My son is fine though he suffers from guilt for what his father did. Guilt that he feels the way he does and feels bad if he isn't nice to his father.
My "sister-in-law" has since tried to contact me to make ammends but you know what Oprah says. "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time." Needless to say, I've not responded.
Me? I've no guilt. Not about them anyway. At this moment I feel nothing but distaste for wasting so much time on a man that doesn't deserve to be the father of my children. Anyone's children. Distaste for who and what he is and allows himself to be. I am not the pillar of humanity but I was obviously the spine of his goodwill, integrity and conscious. I can see his new wife through him, his actions. The crazy way he behaves. He's a coward, a fraud, a leech and she's the viper that is squeezing out of him the benefits of my existane in his life.
Yeah, not much here other than complete numbness towards them. Guess I'm just taking this last year in.
Today I came across a quote by John Porter. He said, "People underestimate their cpaacity for change. There is never a right time to do a difficult thing."
He's right. I can't imagine ever finding a "right time" to derail the train called, "my life."
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